We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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