Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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