i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
