I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
is wine microwaveable?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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