he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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