oh god the rape fog is back!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
She just used a chaser for red wine.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
