My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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