I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
