Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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