I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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