HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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