because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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