Texts From Last Night

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  (510): View more from California

  I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.

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  (510): I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete. http://tfl.nu/ez0g
  Replies (13) Good night (8778) Bad night (685)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"

  (1-478): View more from Georgia

  And thats what homeschooling is for

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  (478): I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!" (1-478): And thats what homeschooling is for http://tfl.nu/vl1o
  Replies (17) Good night (4753) Bad night (738)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420

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  (610): We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420 http://tfl.nu/8lzk
  Replies (27) Good night (6769) Bad night (716)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"

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  (615): I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program" http://tfl.nu/jmw5
  Replies (9) Good night (1710) Bad night (3741)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids

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  (773): halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids http://tfl.nu/g564
  Replies (19) Good night (4392) Bad night (1430)
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  (707): View more from California

  We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.

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  (707): We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE. http://tfl.nu/7oeu
  Replies (9) Good night (1356) Bad night (2314)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.

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  (910): Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen. http://tfl.nu/269t
  Replies (6) Good night (821) Bad night (1402)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.

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  (814): Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate. http://tfl.nu/j5ej
  Replies (10) Good night (1789) Bad night (684)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening

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  (321): I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening http://tfl.nu/wlci
  Replies (4) Good night (1332) Bad night (517)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real

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  (785): My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real http://tfl.nu/x4mj
  Replies (3) Good night (2285) Bad night (440)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"

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  (717): all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever" http://tfl.nu/t8bi
  Replies (7) Good night (353) Bad night (1387)
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  (925): View more from California

  You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there

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  (925): You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there http://tfl.nu/g2al
  Replies (3) Good night (959) Bad night (431)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.

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  (401): He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached. http://tfl.nu/uw2g
  Replies (1) Good night (791) Bad night (354)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.

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  (727): I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly. http://tfl.nu/hgem
  Replies (6) Good night (1539) Bad night (318)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.

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  (443): I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up. http://tfl.nu/vhgn
  Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (259)

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