They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
