I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
