So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
