Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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