so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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