How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
