Do vagina's smell?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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