How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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