I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
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You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
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You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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