whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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