You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize