At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
