Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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