Me too!
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
