oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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