i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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