I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
