bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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