She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
