Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
