Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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