the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
It was confusing and full of hummus
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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