Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
i think im in europe. pls send help
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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