Already got asked if we're dating
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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