I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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