Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
