question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
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his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
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Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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