Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
