What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Randomize
