All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
