Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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