I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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