it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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