I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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