Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
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