it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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