Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
